Last Friday was a pretty good day. My parents came into town (which at least half of my marriage enjoys), my wife's basketball team won a good game against a good team, my kid had been pretty good lately, and I had just ate some PF Changs and drank some good liquor with my father. Late Friday night I was drinking some Crown and making my picks for the wild card weekend. The last game for me to pick was the Pittsburgh vs. Denver game, in which I picked the Steelers. I went on to say that I was off the Tebow bandwagon and was done drinking the kool-aid. Let me tell you what has happend since then:
Saturday morning: Houston crushes Cincinnati, ruining my 3 team teaser for that whole day. All Cincinnati had to do was lose by less than 11, is that so much to ask? Little did I know that this would just be the beginning of a bad betting weekend.
Saturday afternoon: my wife's team gets beat by 33 in which the opposing team came down the floor with 3 seconds left and hit a 12 foot jump shot to take their lead from 31 to 33 as the buzzer expired. Classy.
Saturday evening: the Lion's get crushed, ruining my Detroit pick, but the Saints cover the other 2 things I had in my 3 team teaser. Awesome.
Sunday morning: I go over to get the kids picks for week 17 and he proceeds to choose 11 winners out of 15 games. That's right, he went 11-4 in week 17. Excuse me for one second . . . . %$&sucker, mother&$%#@^!!!!
Ok, I'm back. Soon after that the Falcons not only crush my pick and justification for them winning, but they ruin my 3 team teaser for the rest of the day. An NFL team, made up of incredible strength and athleticism, scored 2 points. How do you look at yourself in the mirror if you are any part of Atlanta's offense? You didn't score at all. The defense scored more than you. Thanks for helping me cover the over.
Sunday afternoon: Tim Tebow throws for 316 yards on 31.6 yards per attempt and beats the Steelers, whom I had picked.
Sunday evening: my wife gets an infection, wears sweats and 2 blankets and still shivers for an hour straight.
Monday morning: I decide to go do some sprints for my workout and strain something that can only be referenced as upper groin. This brings me to wonder, on my mile jaunt back home, how seldom one actually needs to sprint in real life if not playing sports. Which brings me to wonder how the hell I use to do this every day.
Monday evening: I get LSU +8.5 in a teaser for the championship game. The game ends up 21-0 and nearly causes me to change the channel it was so boring. Look, I love defense, but this was supposed to be the 2 best teams in the nation. How can LSU gain under 100 yards of total offense? Brutal.
Ok, I know I picked 3 road teams in 4 games and I know I bet on 3 road teams in 4 games, but in the past 10 years the home team record in Wild Card games has been 21-19. This weekend it was 4-0. How did I know that the Falcons would put up an LSU like performance? Leave it to Eli to stick it to me again. Could all of this be because I jumped off the Tebow band wagon? Am I being punnished for lack of faith in the son of God? What does he expect me to do this week? Go against Belichick? Not gonna happen. Don't care what the line is. On my grave it's gonna say: "Faithful as a $#@%ing dog"
Let's go back a couple of weeks and recap where we are now.
After week 16
Me 49-51 49%
Kid 47-53 47%
Huhns 30-28 52%
Brent 35-37 48%
So I'm up 2 games on the kid and etching ever closer to Huhn's little giant genius. Then I go over to the kids house and he proceeds to pecker slap me with his 11-4 picks. Seriously try this. Try to go 11-4 sometime, tell me how hard it is. Unbelievable. That's ok, he has a little surprise coming up that is going to rock his attention needy filled world.
After week 17
Me 57-58 49.7%
Kid 58-57 50.3%
Brent 43-44 49.1%
Huhns 40-33 54.8%
So not only does my lead evaporate, but the kid jumps up a game going into the playoffs. Not to mention the Huhn's, somewhere quietly leaving us for the friendly confines of Moscow, ID, continue to be better than 50% at picking winners. Don't worry I had an even better week in the playoffs.
After Wildcard Playoffs
Me 58-61 47%
Kid 60-59 50.2%
Brent 47-44 56.4%
Huhns 43-34 58.1%
Welcome to the bottom of the barrel, population me, the Falcons, LSU, and Eli Manning's body language. Good thing I do all that research and looking at stats each week. Apparently I should just look at logos and see which one I like better. You've gotta be kidding me. 7 games left in the year. I need to make a strong push.
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